yukiko

a dance in battle costumes

you and i are like wounded beasts

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eh...?
xenophobe
been feeling really disconnected from everybody lately. like everyone's interests are diverging from my own, and it's times like this that i wish i was/had been more social or something, so that i could draw from a larger pool of friends.

"most human contact is so painful and horrible"

someone said that on some board I was lurking the other day, and it's kind of true.

like, how do you just FIND people that like the same shit as you, that live kind of in the same area as you, that don't have some weird character flaws that make interaction impossible? i feel like i should be able to figure this out, but man, i'm 28 and it hasn't happened yet, not really.

i'm starting to entertain the notion that i actually dislike everybody and that i subconsciously sabotage my potential friendships.

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... I'll be up in boston in May for ROFLcon again. We have to meet up again because I miss you. We could commiserate together about humanity and how we hate it.

Honestly, I think people respond to other folks just being OUT there to engage with. I wrote my friend the other day that since I've been going to this weekly queer dance party pretty frequently, and I dance like I don't care pretty much all the time, it makes people want to know me (kinda lame/kinda cool). Additionally, just putting my writing out there in zine format has made a lot of people want to connect. It's kind of stupid. . . Cause we can do this stuff online all we want, but people don't care about online in so many ways, that it takes doing some sort of public performance for folks to want to reaaaally get to know you. Spectacle. :P

Also, with the deepest honesty, I think Massachusetts is not the best place to meet cool people. I lived there for four or five years and only met like three cool people in the time I lived there, and even then their interests only met with a select set of mine. Move to another city, my dear. Or just come visit me for a week in the summer. I'll give you a bike to ride and everything. We will porch hang and party.

Yeah Massachusetts is weird, Boston in particular. For a city that is smattered with colleges, and is considered a "major" city, there is a surprisingly provincial (read boring) vibe here. Most everything closes early. Not that i'm even really the type to crave a vibrant nightlife every night... I wish I was living in southeast asia or something... could just walk outside and be in a nightmarket, chilling on some milk crate chairs having a beer on the street and eating food on sticks...

man i'd love to come visit for a bit. I'm in such a bad way though, in terms of being able to afford anything. I'm sure we'll meet up again :D

weird that I just happened to check this today, for the first time in months...

I could write a pretty long essay here. After moving to a new city and all. Anyway...my best success has been friends of friends, school, volunteering, and work. In that order... It's impossible to meet people who stay in all the time, and vice versa. Make plans with people you think are cool, do activities where you can interact with people you'd like. Have parties.

There's a rule in business networking that is never eat alone. If you want to hang out with more peeps, try inviting people with you every time you do something.

~ab

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